Please Tell Me…Why the “BLEEP” Am I Studying French in Turkey…

Published on by jesuisjaton

By: JaTon Kılınç

The first and most obvious reason is simple: I’m crazy, lol.

The other night, just as I was winding down for bed, I could not remember how to say “I’m sorry” in Turkish. It was right on the tip of my tongue, yet the only thing that came out was Je suis désolé—“I’m sorry” in French. Panic set in immediately. How could this be? I had just told the immigration officer how sorry I was for being a few minutes late to my residency appointment, and only the other day I had apologized to my husband—aka “teddy bear”—after he had a rough day at the office. Surely, I had memorized that phrase.

I was convinced it was as solid in my brain as the number nineteen in French, which, thanks to my ninth-grade classmates, I have never forgotten. A few of the boys in class decided to turn dix-neuf into “these nuts” whenever the teacher made us count aloud. Because the words sounded similar, the teacher never caught on, but the entire class laughed every single time. My American readers will likely understand what I mean by this. To this day, whenever I count in French, I can still hear those mischievous voices echoing in my head.

Mes amies, I had to immediately kick “Mr. French” out of my mental bed and go chasing after my Turkish lover in the recesses of my mind. My fingers itched to grab one of my phrase books or my translator, but I refused to give in. I knew that if I tried hard enough, I could remember. After all, a girl should never forget how to ask for help, apologize, or—dare I say—beg in a foreign language. Those are some of the most important tools in the linguistic toolbox.

Finally, the phrase came rushing back to me like a freight train, and relief washed over me. Looking back, it is ridiculous how paranoid I was about “losing my touch” with Turkish.

When I packed my luggage, I thought nothing of bringing nearly every French book I owned. I even subscribed to weekly emails from Frédéric at Talk in French to study both languages simultaneously. (He is wonderful, by the way. This is not a paid advertisement—just genuine appreciation for great content.)

However, the problem is clear: these two languages could not be more different. They belong to entirely different language families and are structured worlds apart. Both use the Latin alphabet, but each conjures a completely distinct atmosphere—one evokes flour fights and bidets, while the other calls to mind dervish dancers and mosques. Although now that I live in Turkey, I see a few similarities. Both remind me of fresh bread and rich cuisine.

Mes amies, I will tell you this: that night I fell asleep with my Turkish companion close beside me, begging him never to scare me like that again—only after apologizing to “Mr. French” for discarding him so abruptly. I even told Frenchie to stay near; after all, we could always have a quick rendezvous in the morning before coffee.

The real question remains: Why the “bleep” am I studying French in Turkey in the first place, when I should be focusing on mastering Turkish?

It is a fair question. I could not even tell my new spa girl to give me a moment to breathe during my Brazilian wax (ladies, a warning: wax jobs in Turkey are very different from those in America). I literally had to remind myself, “JaTon, woman up—you’ve had a child, for heaven’s sake. You can and will survive this hair removal session.”

Anyway, back to the point. The first and most honest answer is simple: I love French. The second is that I am competitive—extremely competitive, even with myself. I once read that it is possible to learn two languages at once, as long as they are not from the same language family. The author also mentioned that it was not necessarily recommended, but if you give me an inch, I will take a mile. So let us kindly forget that part.

Being an optimist by nature, I decided to go for it.

I can personally attest to why similar languages can cause confusion. During my time in Italy, I kept replying to people in Portuguese, and while visiting my husband’s family in the Netherlands, I once mistook the cartoon characters’ Dutch dialogue for English until my ear caught the familiar guttural sound. Even my husband sometimes slips into Dutch mid-sentence without realizing it.

The third reason I continue studying French is simple: hearing it soothes me. When I hear French on television, it feels like a long-lost friend has joined me in Turkey. When my ears grow tired from the challenge of Turkish, I switch the channel, and I no longer feel like such an outsider. I may not understand every word, but the familiarity comforts me.

It might not be the same as watching Neil deGrasse Tyson explain the solar system on British television at ten o’clock at night, but it still brings me joy. And yes, I admit it—I watched a show on quantum physics with a glass of wine in hand. Let us call that adulting 101.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but I am not so sure that applies to language lovers. Languages can be fickle companions, running off with another the moment your brain gets distracted.

I do not know how long we will stay in Turkey, which is precisely why staying connected to French makes sense. Unlike Turkish, which is primarily useful only within Turkey, French is spoken around the world. Of course, since I am married to a Turk, Turkish is equally essential. How else would I gossip with my mother-in-law? (Just kidding—love you, teddy bear.) Actually, I usually talk about him right in front of her and then ask him to translate what I said, lol.

As I close this week’s post, I would love to hear from you. Have any of you tried juggling more than one language at a time? What tactics do you use to keep both fresh in your mind? Drop me a line or two below. I would love to know how you manage to stay loyal to one language while still keeping the other alive—because, truthfully, I feel like I am on the verge of a linguistic divorce every other day.

Until next time mes amies,
Stay young, stay curious & stay true
–Je suis JaTon

16 thoughts on “Please Tell Me…Why the “BLEEP” Am I Studying French in Turkey…”

  1. That was great, really enjoyed. Must say be nicer to your Teddy bear especially when he is the one translating to your mother-in law..
    Very good question.
    Going with Dutch under your belt to the States. Can be challenging. Of-course others can experience it or think differently.
    From my point view current words sounding same or close. like huis or house, voet or foot, komen or coming, dat or that. dank je or thank you.
    When you have this, specially in the begin years, like me, I merged the two languages in one. this can be very confusing for the opposite party.
    My strategy was to focus one language at the time. That was English as I am in a English speaking country. Even than things could still slip in from the dutch part.
    The words was one challenge, there is also grammar is another challenge. The Dutch grammar is not the same as English grammar. From what I heard it is like Spanish backward from English.
    When you don’t pay attention, you create without knowing very interesting sentences. Having people looking like a deer in the headlights.

    Curious how others experiencing other languages when immigrating to different country.

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    1. Hmmm…interesting. I would like to only focus on one language but I bore very quickly and I’m impatient so I’ll probably keep French at least in the background. I will definitely make Turkish a priority. Also regarding the teddy I’m always nice to him; he knows lol. Thanks so much for responding and I’m happy you enjoyed my rant lol.

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      1. When I worked in Turkey I found that people really appreciated my work on learning Turkish, but they also really esteem those who speak other languages, and some older folks only spoke French (back in 2004, at least).

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I agree wholeheartedly that Turks love to see foreigners at least trying to speak Turkish. Unfortunately for me there aren’t any French living in these small coastal Turkish towns; plenty of Brits & Russians near Fethiye though. I did meet some French in Izmir so we’ll see what kind of luck I find in Istanbul lol. Thanks so much Shira for taking the time to read my article.

        Sincères amitiés
        JaTon

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      3. Hi, again, JaTon:

        Yeah, it was a life-saver, neighbors in Izmir appreciating my Turkish, although I also got an earful for similar reasons (I think I posted that just this week, but let me know if you want the link here …), but I wouldn’t lament the lack of French people: my experience in France was not great.

        Stay safe,
        Bises

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Bonjour, JaTon:

    Moi, c’est Shira, et j’ai travaillée aussi en Turkey. (uzgunum/desolée, j’ai oublie l’ortographie pour écrire Turkey en français)

    Pour fair avec plusiers langs a la fois, je fais ça:
    1.) chaque jour j’ecris dans une langue diferent -une lang pour chaque jour, donc, Salu gunu c’est le mardi, et j’ecris dan mon journal intime en Turk. Jueves, c’est le juedi, et j’ecris en espagnol, et les vendredis sont pour écrire en français, même si je n’ai jamais aimée cet lang. Il m’a fallu l’apprendre en Bretagne, et maintenan j’ le guard grace aux Lupin et au livres audio gratuits de LibriVox.org

    2.) je regard des shows comment Lupin: dans l’ombre d’Arsène, et j’ai vu plein des films Astérix, comme “Asterix: Mission Cléopatre”

    3.) Je fais des injures en français. Comment quand je n’a pas le temps d’écrire, je dis “Merde!!” et ça m’aide a me rapeller des mots en français.

    Bon apprendisage,

    (dis moi si tu veux que je le traduise ça…)
    Shira Destinie

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    1. Hi Shira! This is awesome. It sounds like you have a very similar practice to mine. I started using a daily planner to plan out my day in Turkish but I still continue to watch French films and study French at night.

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      1. Hey, Good Morning (or evening, I believe: which city are you in? Sounds like Bodrum or such?)
        Yup, that’s pretty much what I do, but I found that diary/journal writing in target language helps me connect the new one to my older languages. Most folks brains need old stuff to hook new info. on to, and I found that it also works for my math students, even (worked better when I got to finally teach history, but you’ll see that on my blog if you get a chance to visit).
        Hope to see you my way.
        Sevgiler/Bises
        ps: I have reviewed A. Mission Cléo. at least once, it’s so good! Highly recco.!
        S.

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      2. Hey there Shira:
        I was in Fethiye for a bit which is South of Bodrum–same region though. Its 2 hours north of Antalya. I spent more time in Kusadasi which is a small coastal town near the archaeological site “Ephesus.” I’ll be sure to check out your blog!

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      7. Shira, I agree on all points. Turkey is very beautiful and a bit underrated with all of its history and warm people in my personal opinion. The Brits have definitely made themselves very cozy in the Southern Coast in Fethiye and it drives the prices in that area big time. A lot of the locals live on the outskirts. I didn’t meet any Brits in Kusadasi as it seems to mainly just be a pit stop for the cruise ships and anyone visiting Ephesus or the Virgin Mary’s final resting place. I only ended up there because one of my husband’s cousins lives there. But–ah I’m so jealous I didn’t do any bicycling across Turkey; but I did enjoy some really cool ruins near Kusadasi and Fethiye. Maybe on our next excursion we’ll do a bit of biking. Thanks for sharing!

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